Campbell's: Newest Entry in the Mind Control Business

 

The above photo is via The Wall Street Journal, and it is point-by-point breakdown of Campbell's soup's new can redesign, which was carefully crafted after intensive market research that scrutinized neurological and bodily reactions.


This qualifies as legitimate mind control, because people's thoughts on the product were broken down to such a level that the absolutely ideal label for today's generation was made. It is a very notable upgrade when you compare it to the old standard, and I have to be honest, the steam rising from the bowl does provoke a very visceral reaction. I'm actually hungry having looked at that picture, and I ate not that long ago.


This is just not fair. Obesity in America is never going to vanish (not that I had any real hope) if sub-healthy products continue to portray themselves in such glorious light. I know that marketing techniques like this are not really a new thing, but this just clarifies corporate America's ability to warp our insights into their products into something inescapably desirable. Just look at it... so... nice... warm... soft... delicious...


GIVE ME THE SOUP, SHIT-HEAD! I'LL STEAL YO' BABY!

Sorry, what just happened? Was I in a coma?

I've gotta get me some updated bowls.

I know it's time consuming, but peoplez gotta learn how to cook. Microwaves and frozen or canned foods are enablers, super-discounted one-way tickets to fatsville (Kevin Smith, you're not invited) - and when paired with 3 days worth of HBO On-Demand, slipping into a hydrogenated oil-soaked death bed never sounded so.... easy.

-nosoupforyou